Tuesday, May 11, 2010

I Love to TEASE....

Holy Guacamole! Again with a tease that is less than 500 words. Someone call a doctor quick! There's something terribly wrong here....LOL

Enjoy!

**thanks! you guys are all made of WIN and covered in AWESOME SAUCE...uh, that sounded vaguely dirty :)**

13 comments:

  1. This is really beautiful! I love it :)

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  2. awwwwwww, this was just so purdy! I love the descriptions. Especially this: Because then I wouldn’t have the particularly heavy albatross of a dead sister anchored to my neck.

    Nice visual. Loved it!

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  3. Wow, I really liked the last half of this!! The first everything. That connection they have, and how easy it is to slip back to it despite your own promises against it, because of being afraid of that hurt, that numbness. Very beautiful!

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  4. That last line is so striking; the entire thing wonderfully visual and oddly relatable. Beautiful!

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  5. This was great, and I like that it's not so depressing. I loved this: "“Me, too.” I muttered under my breath. Because then I wouldn’t have the particularly heavy albatross of a dead sister anchored to my neck."

    Great, great, great!

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  6. This story just keeps getting better and better. I like the complex past she and Julian have, it adds more weight to what's happening in the present, and we get just enough of a hint to want to know more about their history together :)

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  7. I particularly love the paragraph about how Julian was the first -- everything. It's gorgeous.

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  8. Every time I read this, I love it more and more. Seriously. Especially the parts where she addresses Hope and asks why she did it. :(

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  9. This was a great tease, very emotional and real. I can't wait to read more!

    I loved this line, "Because then I wouldn’t have the particularly heavy albatross of a dead sister anchored to my neck."

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  10. Great, great teaser. I like the technique you're using, where your MC addresses her dead sister as if she's alive. Asking questions that will never get answers. It's intense.

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  11. You kept me so engaged throughout this, and the last bit was just beautiful, how he was her first everything and going back to that and not wanting to be numb...just gorgeous. I really loved this.

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  12. Ooooh I love this! I love how she thinks back to firsts. The kissing scene is hawt! :) Me likes!

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